A Life Well Lived

July

In my early years the sun was always shining or so it seemed; blue skies, friends and fun were the order of the day.  I was a happy child with lots of friends and caring adults to encourage me along and I loved those 6 week holidays!

We usually went to Scarborough for our holidays, there was not much money in my family but Mum always managed  to save enjough for us to have  week away at the seaside; usually  a cheap  boarding house, no where near the front but we all felt very grand staying in digs.  We had to vacate our rooms by 10 am and not allowed back until six, in time for dinner, nevertheless, we had a great time, all day on the sands, digging, making huge holes, (?) And, if in funds, we bought tin buckets ànd spades and little paper flags to adorn the turrets of our sand castles.  We would toil endlessly, digging, building and running to and fro filling our buckets with sea water to fill up the moats; all day, we, in our little hand knitted bathers, whilst my Mother sat in her deck chair wearing her Harris Tweed overcoat!  When it was time to go home we would leap onto the  castles we had so arduous built, flatten them and return back ‘home’ for supper. When we’d eaten,  we would go off to walk the prom  with rests in the glass framed shelters and watch the sea; at nine o’clock we would repair to Jacomellis for hot Horlicks and so to bed. We repeated this daily, every year and loved it.

Princess Elizabeth at Pudsey Park

July 1949 the year Princess Elizabeth came to Pudsey Park and I was there, perched aloft, sitting on top of the gateway to the park clapping; the Princess noticed me and said ” take care “. Fame!

Venice Lido

July in the 60s. Many many holidays “on the continent” as we then called Europe, hitch hiking, motorbiking and latterly by Beetle, my first car bought by me from the proceeds of winning a case against the Inland Revinue!  Always living in a two-man tent and eating in transport cafes, we travelled many countries including Titov’s Yugoslavia, then a most difficult country to enter and exit. Happy days.

July 1969 the year of the moon landing. Pregnant with Rebecca and homeless; the flat we had contracted was not available until August so we were lodging with Anne and her then husband Patrick in the meantime.  Our TV was not in storage but propped on the end of our bed, so, on that historic night, we four plus two bumps ( Jonathan was also being incubated) sat huddled together to watch those first giant steps for mankind.

July 1972 my annus horibilis.  Pregnant with Christopher, house sharing with Judy and Sami Morris, working part time for Veronica and still struggling financially.  John had long gone with his paramour, Diana, and was still in denial regarding his parenthood of my baby.  With the support of Anne, Veronica and Judy I was managing to work, care for Rebecca and attend ante natal classes, but I was exhausted.  Clearly pregnant, an observation carefully ignored by neighbours and clients alike, I was worried sick about my survival skills, how to keep all the balls in the air, I had no nearby family and could not counternance  long term support of my good friends. So many sleepless nights.

As I passed the 20 week milestone I knew my time for procrastination was up: decisions had to be made and, by 22 weeks, on the legal limit, I was booked in at King Edward VII Memorial Hospital to terminate my pregnancy.

I will say no more than it was horrible, sharing the bottom of the ward with three others awaiting the same surgery was disgusting.  Those three young women, laughing and joking about ” getting rid” was insufferable. I wept all night.

I was taken home by Anne:  Anne, my dearest friend, a then nervous driver with a newish baby  and truckulent toddler, managed me, my baggage plus the above to the car park and got us all home safely!!! Thank you Anne.x

July 1974 onwards.  New baby, new husband.  Still as poor as church mice, we still managed holidays . Once to Butlins in Minehead; the children’s choice, much to our horror,  BUT, it was a resounding success!! A package holiday to Spain ( Rebecca’s dream location at that point) was financed by me taking on evening work to supplement my day job, banking my cash in hand loot weekly to ensure that the money was there come the final reckoning.

July 2000 and onward. Now with Suresh, who became my final and best husband.  We went to Jazz festivals, sometimes several each year. Wonderful hot summer days spent Riverside with likeminded people; glorious days of music, al fresco eating and drinking and sex. What great memories; now at 81, I often listen to some good jazz and am transported hot summer days at various venues and I smile.

Another July, long days getting the Bath garden into shape: lugging huge stones around to create borders,, building a circular eating area into the sloping lawn, begging and borrowing plants, seeds and  cutting from fellow gardeners all to create the wonderful garden we ended up with. A real labour of love …

Garden in Ongar

July in Ongar.another bare patch to transform. Suresh was happily ensconced in his new garden office whilst I started on the graft. Raised beds to build, brick paving to lay and plants to bed in. I had brought over 60 pots with me from Bath, mostly cutting I’d taken in preparation for the move. Suresh was dismayed at the non- garden saying I should never have bought the house, he couldn’t help as he was not a gardener, etc etc My response? ” Your job is to cook dinner when I’m gardening, and, at 6 o’ clock, call me in with a glass of red wine , smile and say ” Well done”” He never, ever, failed, right to the end.

Mimi & Jack

July 20th my first grandson arrived and was overjoyed to see Rebecca who had  phoned me at 3am to say ” Mum, I’ve got a son” ; Mimi and I piled into the car to meet and greet the little man, Mimi was very concerned that we were going out in our nighties, but nevertheless, enjoyed the nighttime jaunt. Jack was a red faced angry young man who scowled at his sister and me; he was not impressed! I was of course, delighted at the safe delivery, this time at home with the help of a birthing pool.

July 2024 Widowed now for 14 years, my garden is a thing of beauty,  full of bees, butterflies and birds, a joy to the eye in all seasons and another room for me to enjoy. So happy that I was lucky enough to inherit my Mother’s gardening gene!